Well, here I am on Blogger now. I've really wanted to get back into the blogging world ever since I abandoned the Cat's Hat, and now I'm back!
For those of you who never read the Cat's Hat, here's a short rundown. After living all over the country and attending college at SDSU (go Aztecs! Your Queen calls!), I spent a couple of years in San Diego before settling in Brooklyn (Dun dun DUN!). While I was in America's Finest City, I was mekareved by the Mormons (more on that later), and pushed from Conservative to full-on Orthodox by, of all people, a Messianic (more on that later, too.) I began attending Torah shiurim, stopped driving on Shabbos (at least during the day), and made the decision that if I ever moved to New York, I would become Orthodox. I moved to the Big Apple in 2005, met Builder at a Torah shiur, and we got married six months later. We now have two little girls, Thing 1 and Thing 2, who I am homeschooling.
So, why start a blog? After six years, I've come to the conclusion that the Orthodox Jewish package doesn't match the wrapping. With a husband and two kids to consider, I only have four realistic options:
1. Chug the kosher Kool-Aid and try to become more "frum." This will never work because I don't like Kool-Aid (the drink and the mindset). In fact, if I smell Kool-Aid, I run for the hills.
2. Leave observance. Not an option. For one thing, it would affect Builder and the Things. For another, I actually believe in the Torah, at least the Tanach part. Some of the Midrashim...well...I'd rather not say.
3. Live a life of quiet desperation. I'm a little too loud for that.
4. Separate the community from the religion. So far, I've had the most success here. Unfortunately, it violates a precept taught in Pirkei Avos: "Al Tifrosh Min Hatzibur." Do not separate yourself from the community.
So, I believe in Hashem, and Hashem's Thirteen Attributes. I believe in the Torah, and do mitzvos. I daven, and teach my girls to daven. However, I also believe that the Orthodox community, as it stands, is in one of the most bigoted, corrupt, materialistic, and arrogant phases since the time of the Nevi'im.
So, this blog will explore my thoughts. Thoughts on being in the community, and yet out of it. Thoughts on homeschooling in an area where it's unheard-of. Thoughts on why we need to look outside of our daled amos and realize that this evil will affect us. Thoughts on the Parsha, and the Midrashim that just...don't really make sense. And, thought about why this blog is needed. See, the are a lot of OTD blogs. There are a lot of apikorsus blogs. And there are a lot of blogs for the Orthoprax. But there aren't many for people like me.
You need to move to a different Jewish community, preferably one in a smaller city. In smaller communities we lack the whackjobs who think they need to make you miserable if you want to be "one of the gang".
ReplyDeleteI guess you missed the part about me being married with two small children. I'm not really a big fan of making them uproot themselves. Besides, I love NYC--an hour on the train and I am in the biggest city in America! And believe me, I take that ride on as frequent a basis as possible.
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